Cap’n Crunch Reveals Full Name
BREAKING NEWS: Cap’n Crunch has a full name!
According to Megnut and this month’s Saveur Magazine, the captain’s full name is Cap’n H. M. Crunch, or Captain Horatio Magellan Crunch.
In other Cap’n Crunch news, the Cap’n ain’t the Cap’n no more. According to this article from Pop Culture Magazine, the Cap’n was promoted to Commodore in 2004. Comm’dore Crunch had this to say.
“It’s about damn time,” said the maritime cereal spokesman in his trademark, slightly quivering voice.
Commissioned in 1963 to increase the appeal of the cereal of the same name, he feels the recognition is overdue. “I could have used the time to sail the high seas, trading in spices and silks from the orient,” Crunch said.
The Cap’n was promoted ahead of such other noted captains as Morgan, Kangaroo, and America. “Cap’n deserves this a lot,” said Captain America. “He may not have fought Nazis like I did in World War II, or even participated in major action in the South Seas, but educating people on a satisfying part of a complete breakfast is a worthy task.”
Photo from The Imaginary World.